Hopes and Disappointment

I don`t know how to start up the day worst. To know I did some mistake in my final mistake, or to find out that I had below average marks in both my coursework for two subjects.

It`s hard to comprehend really. How did that ever happen. Getting marks below average. It`s fine (to some extend) if didn`t scored the highest. But below average. WTF. Also coupled with the fact that i actually spent some effort studying in this semester, what is the message that I`m getting?

That I`m stupid?

That I`m too arragont to realized that?

or simply, this are circumstances force on me to be humble.

I resent these. There was a glimmer of hope, that I can do well. But that hope turn into a dissapointment. It usually don`t happen. I always knew what I was getting into. Not this time. I don`t know what went wrong. I don`t know how to make it better.

I`m tired. There`s no point trying everything all over again. Enough of restart. I just want everything to end.

My first post in a protected blog

Now I can say absolutely anything I want.

But I have nothing to say at the moment. Wtf.

There was a glimmer of hope after my presentation. I`m not going to fail after all. They might be a chance of getting an A-, but even then, my gpa will drop. Bleh.

I hate setting targets that are too hard to achieve.

Chula BP Asians Debating Championship

Q&A: Why do I update my blog less frequent than before.

I write a lot more these days. It is just that I write a lot less here in my blog, because I find writing about myself is simply not worth it.
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I was in Thailand for a week to attend the 1st Asian BP Intervarsity Debating Championship. Though my motivation for going there is not so much to debate, but rather to see some old friends that I met in previous tournament.

But typical to other international tournament, I end up meeting new people and spent most of my time talking nonsense n between rounds. I had made it quite clear that I want to quite debating, and been trying very hard not to attend anymore competition. So this time, I took a number of days off from debate to go sight seeing around Bangkok.

Having said that, it`s so painful to see that some other teams are up there in the finals, while I sit around doing nothing. It was that spark of jealousy, disappointment and anger that nearly tempted me to go back and train for debate again.

My juniors, which end up finish in the bottom half of the tabs.

Maybe a nudge from God will go a long way in helping me deciding what to do. :P

Donating in the some temple. lol.

Until then, beer will do just fine.


Goals/Target/To-do list

It`s been a while since my thoughts bothered me so much till I can`t sleep. I`m not sure what prompted this, but there are so many things running in my head right now. I think, at the top is probably my academic results.


It has made me quite depress after scoring quite badly last year. I had a 3.53 gpa and it partially contributed to the reason why I took a semester off. My cgpa went to 3.75 after that and the prospect of graduating with a 3.85 (my initial target in my 1st year) is unachievable. It was disappointing when the Student Affairs Division and Exam unit wanted to recommend me for the President`s Award (highest award given to a student) but couldn`t because of my horrible grades. (they need at least a 3.8).

It was the first time that I was limited by academic performance. Having been slightly above average all the time, things usually fall in my favor. I got into the university of my choice, the scholarship that I wanted. When facing with this stumbling block, I felt like a crippled. I had absolutely no confidence in my application to Cambridge due to such mediocre academic performance. I don`t have good communication skills or any special talent in engineering to boast either.

I have been side track too many times, but for now, I think the first step is to get my grades back up to 3.8. I found out there are 2 subject that I can retake to push my grades significantly. Those two subjected that I screwed up pretty badly due to my commitment to debate tournaments. Since I don`t have that much time to spare, I`ll probably retake one of it. Just by dropping that subject will pushed my current grades to 3.78, and scoring an A will push it up to 3.796. If I go all out and take another subject while scoring A for the rest, I can effectively push it back up to 3.86.

Though that would mean having no life at all, camping in library everyday, and waking up for 8am classes. I definitely don`t think it`s worth it. There are so much that I wanted to do. Fulfilling the vision of the student publication board, ensuring my debating club have proper leaders to take over and continue to achieve.

So after all this reflection in the past two hours, these are the things that I have pledge to do:

1) Consult my lecturer on retaking Strength of Material (first year subject)
2) Graduate with at least a 3.80 pointer.
3) Win an engineering award for my final year project.
4) Ensure daily update on my university online news portal.
5) Getting at least 1000 people on campus to read the news
6) Daily meetings for the board 3-5 pm.
7) Daily group study session at night. 8-10pm

All I need now is the strength and will to carry on.

Wow, A complete lack of updates.

I`ve been writing a fair bit over the past week. None of it is on this blog, or msn shout outs or on facebook. It seems there`s very little attachment left for my online social networking sites. I finally have a life? Lol


Significant highlights in the past 1 week.

1) I`m extremely glad to see more than 25 articles in the pipeline since came in to help to restructure the Student Publication Board. I have also get a fair bit of complain of "Bossy, likes to order people around" title. Which is absolutely fine with me.

2) Argubly, also earned the title of most kepoh student on campus. I knew exactly what event`s happening at what time, and place, and the reporter who`s assigned to write up on those article. On the contrary, I don`t even know my lectures time table.

3) Skipped too many class that I think attendance now stands at 10%

4) I moved my piano to my new home and got it tune. It sounds amazingly nice, though I barely have time to play it.

5) Went for a lan party last Saturday and played Dota in a team fulled of pro players. It`s extremely scary. My team won before any of the other team reach lvl 10. I contributed absolutely nothing to the team :)

6) My uncle came down to took my motorcycle back home. I tried not to use the car too often and got myself a bicycle instead to save the environment.

I guess that`s the updates for now. I need some motivation to go to class and study for my mid term next week. I think I`ll be in serious trouble if I continue skipping more classes. Till then :)

The quest to get a banner

Alex goes to ask someone:

Person A : The banner is in the store room
*goes to the store room and finds it lock.

Person A: The key to the room is with Person B
*goes to person B

Person B : Oh, the door lock is actually spoil.
*for how long?
: couple of months
*then why are you not fixing it?
: waiting for person C to buy the replacement lock
* goes to person C

Person C : I think we have a spare lock somewhere in the room. Ask back Person A
* goes to person D

Person A : Ouh, yea we do have a lock, but we don`t want to break it down. We need to ask the maintenance guy.
* loses patience: then why don`t you call the maintenance guy.
: It`s lunch hour. I`ll call after lunch.

2 hours later

Person A: Oh, I forgot to call, let me call them now.

1 hours later :

*maintenance guy no where to be found.

At the end of the day;

The store room is still lock and no banner

Academic Week 1

Phew. I`m actually quite relieved.


I think a lot have happened, and I really felt like a different person already.

There are a few milestones this week.

1) Completing my internship.
2) Moving out of my old house and into a new one with my classmate
3) Resolved my credit hour issue
4) Settled my course registration
5) Selected a lecturer for my Final Year Project
6) Dealt with my whole emotional swings with regards to my previous relationship.
7) Rejoin the Student Publication Board.

Things will be slightly different this year and I`m looking forward to a exciting final year :)

The last weekend

It was as quiet as it can get. One would expect people to party till they drop dead on their last. Any last. Here I am, spending 12 hours in the office, walking endlessly on Jusco, wondering whether I should buy the shoe that I have been eying for the past one month.

There are things I had in mind. Like going for a hike at Penang, walking around the day, or just spending my afternoon at the botanical garden. But in my plans, there`s always someone there. In the absences of companies, those plans doesn`t seem too interesting anymore. The internet and arcade filled in the void just fine.

So, here`s to my last weekend at Penang. A toast to the end of 4 months's (academic) isolation and a life back in Malacca.

*in all fairness, I did enjoy my time here. I had my share of clubbing, hangovers during the morning in office, and sports till I can barely move. Cheers.

There will be times when one listen to a song, he'll say, 'that`s exactly what I`m feeling right now'. Often, we marveled at how words by other can accurately reflect our feeling, especially when we fail to express them with our own.

The following poem is written by Joash back in 2007. It was as relevant then as it is now. In the midst of uncertainty, I find this comforting.

Title : To say I love you.

To say I love you, is more than just words from the mouth
It's more than just mere stuff that any guy would say to a pretty girl hoping that the girl would respond
But it's a commitment I promise not to you, but to myself
To be there for you whether or not you need me by your side

To say I love you, is more than just a present
A gift that can be bought with money or prizes
But it's a price that has been paid for, with tears and pain
To put that smile not just on your face, but in your heart

To say I love you, is nothing about wanting you
It's nothing about hoping that you can be there for me or that you will always be by my side
But it's about letting you have the best you can ever want
Even if it means that you will never put me first even if I make you the princess of my heart

To say I love you, is always about you and you alone
Your happiness, your laughter, your joy, your life
To hope that you will always have the best in life, to give you the best of me
Even if it requires me to love you without being loved in return

To say I love you, it means more than anything to me
Coz I know that at the end of the day, it's not what you do in return that truly matters
But what I've done for you, and what I can do to you, that could make a difference
Even if love hurts to much and if the process gets to painful

You see,
when many can love each other, not everyone can love without being loved in return
when many can wait for each other, not everyone can wait for nothing

Yet when someone makes that decision to wait and love with no assurance of a future,
that brings out the true essence of love altogether
Coz Love, after all,
is about giving without getting
is about paying without receiving
is about dying to yourself for others
and to hang on even when it gets too hard and tough.

To say I love you,
I truly mean it, and I do mean it. Just hope you'll understand.

Inspiration

I dire need for writer`s inspiration to write my Internship report, Final Year project proposal and Graduate School application. Over usage of verbal broken English translate into writing as well. I can`t help but loathed the things I write. Message are lost in the midst of those jumbled up sentence.

Where do journalist get their inspiration from?

I`m sad.

Today, I'm sad:

because I felt like I`m invisible at the work place.

because a friendship was lost due to food.

because I couldn`t even keep a conversation with someone I really want to talk to at that moment.

because when I really need someone to listen, no one in mind pops up.

because nothing can be done to change these no matter how sorry, or hard I try.

Effie's visit to KL


About 3 weeks ago, Effie came with her bf, Jonathan for a short holiday in Malaysia. I find my self knowing embarrassingly little about my own country. We were to meet at the Islamic Arts Musuem, and I don`t know where it is. Heck, I never even knew we had one.

*and I`m pretty damm sure all you Malaysians who are reading this have no clue where it is either.

It was a pretty good museum. Fantastic design, surprisingly well maintained (obviously from government funding), and like all government`s white elephant project, completely deserted. At the cafe, we were pretty much the only person around. While every single road in kl is cramped with family cars heading for their weekend shopping.

I forgot to take picture in that museum, but I did take a few at the Bird Park about 1km away from the place. Bet you didn`t know either, that the KL Bird Park is the largest covered aviary in the world. I`ll swear I never going to offer to be a tour guide in KL anymore. lol. (at least without researching before hand).


The park was quite amazing in my opinion. They had a cafe where one can have tea and food at the balcony with birds flying around you. And we a silly looking horn bill staring at us for quite some time.
Little did we know, it was a diversion. The horn bills real aim is the left over food at the table beside us.




With a bill that long, its a wonder how they eat. Chewing a simple fries required techniques of throwing, biting, moving it to a different angle, bite again...... jeez, and I thought our life are difficult.

*btw, anyone realized that Effie look remarkably identical to Claire in that picture?.

Random Ideas #34049883349404

The technology of heating up things through waves have long existed. Microwave sends rf signals in 2.5ghz which only elements like water and fats absorbs. I used to think they achieve some form of resonance, and through superposition, we have atoms vibrating at a extremely high amplitude. Just like ppl, when you move a lot, you feel hot. (ok, lousy analogy), but essentially, with the higher energy, we have higher vibration and hence, higher temperature.


I was just thinking if we can somehow send wave that is out of phase with the vibration, we can effectively halt the atom`s movement and achieve extremely low temperature. The only problem is that this theory is flawed. Atoms doesn`t vibrate in a sinusoidal wave, (or at least I don`t think it does), which is why the term was 'RF is being absorb by water molecules" rather than resonates. I`m also not sure how atom vibration in solid state differs from those in gaseous, where atoms zooms randomly in Brownian movements.

But it`s quite a cool concept to think of anyhow. Refrigeration will take embark on a new process. (it already is with the emergence of thermoacoustics).

And on another thought, it will be quite cool to have a portable microwave device also. Just beam at a food and it heats up. Beam at ppl you don`t like, and look at them get boiled. Lol.

The words not spoken.

I came back to say that I miss her.

But somethings are better left unsaid.

Liquid Nitrogen vehicle - going crazy part 3

'Everything that can be invented has already be invented. '
US officer in the Patent Office.

While inventions are still popping up every year, for the average idiot like me, it couldn`t be more true. As I continue my research into solar collectors and heat engines, I had this thought that we might have been looking at things just one side. All conventional technology deals with concentrating heat to create a the temperature difference needed for power.



And it hits me, why not look at creating temperature difference to usage of liquid nitrogen. It`s abundant, 78% of air, and the boiling of nitrogen results in no pollution at all. Use it along with a stirling engine we can run our vehicles, (or add in a generator for an electric vehicle if you`re too concern with torque changes)

A plot of music Anime - going crazy part 2.

*this is a continuation of myself being driven to the brink of insanity due to my ongoing research of my fyp. So once again, do not question the logic of the things I say.

I have typically narrow down my scope of research to solar generation; Stirling engine, thermoacoustics and micro chp (combine heat and power). And what really impress me right now was the whole idea of Thermoaccoustic. Simply because no one really understood it completely yet.
That a lot of grey area, giving rooms for speculation and bizzares theory.

Or it makes a good plot of anime. (where logics can be bend anyway).

Thermoaccoustic accounts for the conversion of thermal (heat) energy to sound. With some stacks (stell wool or other suitable metals), and heat, you can in a way achieve some form of resonance, and some application of the doopler effect, (don`t ask me how). walah, we get our kinectic energy.

So how is this anyway intersting. Now, imagine for some weird reason, the resonance can achieve 1000x its amplitude if a form of arrangement sound and pitch is right. This creates a whole new energy generation through musics. And for some even stranger reason, classical musics provides the best output. Whoever produces the best music are regard as the most powerful person as he controls the most energy.

And here`s a story about a talented young pianist who`s growing up in an academy that trains this 'energy harvest' (think of a better name). In his quest, his being subjected to all corporate conspiracy, politics, and wars.

and as of know, I kinda lost interst in what I`m writing. So yea.....going back to google and wikipedia for my research.

Of Stirling, solar, engine, heat and energy.

Reading about things and gaining knowledge is always a good thing. But reading too much without being able to comprehend them simply makes one more confused. There too many random things going on in mind right now, and confuse is probably an understatement of the state I`m in now. For the past few days, I was blur the whole day and was having sleepless night and frequent nightmares.


I`ve been matter loading the entire week in preparation for my final year project topic selection. I knew I like energy and always wanted to do something regarding conservation, regeneration or co-generation. It started with types of alternative energy, to relativity theory, to quantum physic, particle physics and now back to simple thermodynamics. And now mass is energy, time is non existence, (in the energy context), lights are counted in packets, and heat can be directly converted to sound before converting to kinetic for electricity.

And I have lost all sense of logic, and reference, and limits of nature. Currently, there`s this thing that have been bugging me: why do we use energy to remove energy. Think of it in the context of air conditioning and refrigeration. It consumes significant energy to chill an area, taking away heat (a form of energy) from that system.

The simplest explanation will be of course lie to the fact that we are decreasing temperature from the ambient, (a point of reference), and hence creating some form of potential (not sure if this statement is right since heat is uni directional,). And of course, not all heat is useful (concept of exergy). But the entire earth can be recognize as a form of energy storage, and in reference with the absolute (say 0 kelvin, or the universe), our ambient is itself a form of potential.

Humans have raised the earth`s temperature by almost 2 degree celcious, through all the industrial acticities. That`s a massive increase of energy. Why is it possible to trap energy but not being able to release it. What kind of technology that will be able to operate between the ambient environment and the limit of absolutes?

*I know none of those made sense. Hoping someone can knock back some of it back to my head.


Island Bound

There are many ‘first in life. Your first walk, your first time out of home, your first birthday, your first day at school…… This is my first time, taking a ferri through a car. (or was it a car through the ferry). Anyway, I was pretty excited about the whole idea of driving up a big floating machine, and crossing over to Penang Island by the sea, and the car moving with the engine off.



It took about 15 minute to cross over , and if you don`t have to queue up too long, it is the best route to take when crossing from Butterworth to Penang. Crossing over by the bridge will be another 30km detour. Using the ferri saves fuel, time and (fun?).

Pei Nee finds the wind annoying for messing up her hair.

3 more weeks here and counting. I need to explore Penang as much as possible before I leave. There are a few more landmarks that I really wanted to to visit. The botanical garden, reserve forest, the dam, and also the cruise ship. It almost made me not wanting to leave Penang. :)



September 09

It`s closed to a full month since I last updated!!! I`m not sure if it`s because of the lack of any interesting thing happening, or just pure laziness. So, based on my photo albums, here`s a summary of what happen since my last entry.


I finally blew a birthday candle this year. Albeit only one of them. Yay :)

Had a on site construction experience. Going into a R4A Telekom manhole. ewww.

Finally solved the Rubix Cube.(through layer by layer method). *after being challenge by sze ping to solve it within half a day.

And my kittens grew bigger!! they are no more the tiny, blue eyes cat anymore. But they are still equally cute and much more playful. The white one constantly bully the poor quite black kitten. Saw her bitting another`s tail.

I realized that I took only a few pictures last month. Even when there`s photo worthy opportunities, I was kinda lazy. Like the night at Sky Bar, the sunrise at Penang Bridge and the visit to Islamic Art Musuem. I had lots of pictures of the kittens though. :)

4 more weeks till the end of my internship. I miss you Malacca, will be back soon!!!

Penang trip with family.

Before anything I would like to thank Adelene, Hayati, Terri and Jamie for your calls. There are about 20 other ppl who wish by text, and a whooping 80+ (I stop tracking after that) by facebook message. Since it`s silly to list to everyone here, I hope it`s enough to give just a BIG thank you to all.
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This year was a break from tradition. No presents, no cakes, no hugs. Noting. It would be a lie if I say I`m not disappointed. Especially when your best friends, and ppl you knew more than 10 years didn`t even wish you. But then again, it`s one of the cons of growing old, and being away from everyone else for quite some time.

On the up side, I went on a mini holiday with my family on Sunday in Penang. It`s crazy, driving back to Kajang on Friday night, and head to Penang on Sunday morning. I have never drove for 1000 kilometers in mere 2 days ever! I have spent more time with my car then anyone else in the last weekend.


My family arrived at Penang around 2pm. After having our lunch, checking into Tune hotel, it`s 4pm before we head to Penang Hill.



It`s been 10 years since I last went up to the hill and I have almost no recollection of the place. There`s nothing much to do there to be honest. There`s an overpriced tea mansion where things could be in Thai Bath currency and I`ll still call it expensive. (1 ringgit = 10 Bath).



There`s a tree that was about to fall and I was 'preventing' it from crashing. Basically this area is a remnant of the colonial era, where the buildings still reflects the western architecture with beautiful gardens and hedges. There`s even a display of one of the oldest post box in Malaysia


Notice that letter inlet have been sealed off. Apparently, people tired to be funny and actually tried sending letters with it. Click on the picture below to read the plate at the bottom. It`s states that the thing have been around for almost 2 centuries!

It was about 7pm when we reach back at the foot of the hill. We visited Ke Lok Si, but unfortunately, it`s already closed by then. We had dinner at Gurney Drive and I left back to BM after that. My grandma, mom and bro took a bus home the next day while I work up half a day late for work. :P

"The" Day

Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to Alex.
Happy Birthday to me.

It`s probably the only Birthday song I`ll get this year. How I hated this day.

Miow

All I can say is.... awwwwwwwwww.


Their stares just melts your heart.

No color contacts can match their natural blue eyes.

once again.. everyone... awwwwwwwwwww.



Malaysia's 52nd Independence Day

I realized that this year`s Independence Day is one that I felt nothing at all. *Ironic, how can you feel nothing? What I`m trying to say is the usual patriotism, unity and love your country euphoria is not there at the slightest bit. It’s funny really, how a person can remain so indifferent despite the radio and newspaper spend the past 2 weeks speaking nothing expect for unity and the spirit of Merdeka.

I believe cynicism has probably taken the best out of me. It wasn`t until I drove along the empty roads of Cyberjaya, a small appreciation of the country appear out of the deep corner of my thoughts. That also quickly disappears once I`m reminded of all other political issue that plagued the country since the last election. I grew quite tired of politics and the world 'government'. It`s ridiculous really. Communism sounds like a better way to go at times.

I really hope that all of us can disassociate the government and the country. Only then, I can truly wish, Happy Birthday Malaysia.

The boring phrase of life.

I`m officially a boring, lifeless, old person. I have finally fall into the routine of work-sleep-repeat for 6 days with occasional movies session in between. So the only thing I can blog about is perhaps some of my site visits. Some of them are fairly interesting (in comparison to the life I have right now, the benchmark is really low).

I find the pylon structure really interesting. I reminds me of the giant ginger bread figure I used to draw last time. Of course, my drawing was never much accurate to begin with... so yea. It looks something like that. Or its just my inclination towards and structures that are tall, or somewhat mighty. The pylons towards the right are part of the regional grid lines. One screwed up, and half of Seberang Prai won`t have electricity. Yay!

The picture above is the jacking pit for pipe jacking works. This is where the machine is lowered down and drill a hole horizontally across to the side`s pit. I never thought that installing a pipe underground can be so troublesome. Especially for critical ares like places under the track line, slopes on hills and etc. Leakage can cause settlement and soil erosion, just like the one happen in recently at Batu Ferringgi, Penang. So the pipe have to be placed very deep (about 6 meters) and protected by reinforced concrete. Just laying one simple pipe can cost up to 100k. So the next time a pipe burst, just imagine those poor JBA guys forking out the money.

*and those poor guys working at the hot and muddy area.

The machine just broke down and work`s stalled for the moment. That seems to be the most 'interesting' news I`ve received these days. Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Graduation


And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
And then we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone
And we would get so excitedand we'd get so scared
Laughing at ourselves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

[1]
As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
From whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels

[Repeat 1]

La, la, la, la:
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la:
We will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

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I attended my uni`s convocation last week and realized, that so many of the people I know are graduating this year. The sudden epiphany that I probably will not meet them again in the future got me wondering, why I didn`t try spending more time with them while I`m in university.

I don`t have much time left. In less than a year, it will be my turn. I`m not sure it will be a painful goodbye as this year. (most of my friends are graduating this year), but the thought of leaving the luxury and privileges of a student terrifies me. That said, this reality is inevitable.

Soon I`ll stop wearing the academic hat

and wear a construction safety helmet instead.

One more year to go. Only one.

MSLS 2009

The Malaysian Student Leader Summit was a lot better than I expected. There were many impressive speakers and big shot (some times, they are mutually exclusive) invited to gives speeches and subjected to endless questions by students.


Perhaps, my biggest surprise was the level of hostility in those forum. People were actually far more vocal than the lines that were usually drawn by our government. *and if people say I`m rebellious, that those ppl are definitely revolutionary. Both the students and panelist was debating on contentious issue, with conflicting idea and stances. Tun Mahathir was called a hypocrite by a student, Dato Wong Chung Wai was called ignorant and chidish byDato Saifuddin and Utusan Chief Editor was accused of playing the racial card in his newspaper. (followed by a thurderous applaud by the audience).

It was differently a different experience, having a summit organized by a foreign insitution (UKEC) attended by a bunch of students, with a significant majority studied at UK. Student always enjoyed (almost) unlimited potical capital, and this summit had definitely impress me enough to believed so.

and like all conferences/event, you meet old friends. Though this time, I had no appointment with them whatsoever. I was half afraid that I`m going to spend the time alone. Turns out, I found 8 familiar faces.

More events like this, Malaysia will definitely steer in the right path towards a greater democracy.

說好的幸福呢 歌词

你的回话凌乱着 在这个时刻
我想起喷泉旁的白鸽 甜蜜散落了
情绪摸名地拉扯 我还爱你呢
伴你断断续续唱着歌 假装没事了

时间过了 走了 爱情面临选择
你冷了 倦了 我哭了
一开始的不快乐 你用卡片拭写着.
有些爱只给到这真的痛了

怎么了 你累了 说好的幸福呢
我懂了 不说了 爱淡了 梦远了
开心与不开心一一细数着你再不舍
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻 我都还记得
你不等了 说好的 幸福呢
我错了 泪干了 放手了 后悔了
只是回忆那音乐盒还旋转着
要怎么停呢

St Anne`s feast day

*I`ve lost my enthusiasm to write. This entry is more of a simple note of event that happen rather than a blog post. Its also about time that readers stop coming here since I really doubt there`ll be anything worth reading anymore.
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St Anne`s feast was one of the few things I look forward to since I was here 2 weeks ago. For one, there will be the crowd that was gathered there, and hence an opportunity to meet different group of people. Secondly, my grandmother will be visiting as well.

Though when the day arrived, it wasn`t really as exciting. I pretended to be sick and took a day off. I had dim sum for breakfast with my grandmother, and joined her and her tour group for the rest of the day till mass starts at 8.30 pm.

I didn`t took many pictures. It was too crowded and the was too dark. The is probably one of the nicest churches around (in terms of architecture) Perhaps one day, I`ll take its propor picture during the day.
There was a queue everywhere you go. A queue to the old church to offer your candles. A queue to the shrine. Even a queue to the toilet.

In the end, it was very tiring, and I got to say I didn`t really enjoy very much of the day. But then again, I didn`t really enjoy anything much for the past couple of months. It does seems something is lacking and there`s a void of contentment every night before I go to bed.

That said, this is perhaps, the closest I came to find peace with myself, even when it's just for a few minutes in pray.

What I like in Bukit Mertajam.

I like the fact that my work place is only 5 minutes away. I don`t have to wake up too early to go to work.

I like the curry mee I had today.

I like the shopping malls around here. They have the biggest Jusco I`ve seen, with a few other big malls that are all within 2o minutes.

I like having (at least) a friend who studies around here If I`m being sent to Kamunting instead, things could be much worst.

I like having internet connection all the time, even at a very slow speed.

I like my new car, and been driving it every single day :)

I like a shop, where every dish cost only 2 ringgit. You can order 4-5 dish on a single meal.

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I`m just trying to list down all the positive things to make sure I don`t dwell in misery much longer. Sigggghhhh.

Australs!

There`s loads of things that happen during Australs

I visited the Sanctuary at Healesville.

Hugged a 200 year old tree.

Touch a wallaby.


Visited the winery, again.



Met some girl.
Met lots of girls.

and other people...


Accused someone for losing the access card


Played the piano drunk


and took pictures I don`t remember

also took a picture with my contingent.
But most importantly, I survived Swine Flu!! Yay.
Such a memorable tournament. :)

Quick Update

It`s been too long since I last update my blog. I still haven`t find the energy to upload my blog with pictures, especially from sydney and from australs. Right now, I`m trying very hard to adjust to my new life. It`s been a dramatic change though. Having spent the past month and a half in Australia, I`m finally back home, for 2 days.

I got a new car, moved to a new home in Bukit Mertajam, started my new work there, and basically a new life. Trust me, the shift was so sudden and so bad, I nearly broke down yesterday. I was thrown in here with no familar faces, the house was horribly dirty, and my housemate were 3 malay guys who are not even working in my office. The place have not internet, no hot shower and my office environment was equally as bad.

But I`m working things through. I found Pei Nee in Butterworth, and would probably stalk her for the next 4 months. I spent my way out of misery my eating like crazy and paid a tooth and nail for a personal wireless maxis broadband. I cleaned my room and its livable right now. I figure out the place wasn`t too bad after all. Billion is like 5-10 minutes away and jusco is like 15. There`s a cinema and all I need now is just company.

Going to be optimistic and hope to be happy in the coming 4 months.

I`M BACK

I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!! I`m back!!!!

I`m so glad to be back!!!!... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

The day before the debate.

I find it harder to cope with problems these days. I ended up feeling very stress up, frustrated and I get tired of it very quickly. It could very well be signs of getting old. Or maybe perhaps it’s also the magnitude of these problems.

For example, yesterday I just had a call that the whole bunch of my debaters decided not to come to Australia for the tournament. I had to spent half a day to sort things out and finally found out the culprit who gave misleading information which lead to that trouble.

And the new ruling that we have to be quarantine if you come back from Aussie regardless of having symptoms or not, mean I will have to miss part of my internship. That`ll be quite a problem as I already don`t have any luxury of extending my intern. My classes would have start by then.

Those aside, I`m really beginning to enjoy the quiet life of staying at home. I wake up in the morning, cook lunch, walk around the neighborhood, play the piano, go online, read a good book and retire for the day. While most people been screaming, ALEX YOU`RE WASTING YOUR HOLIDAY, I felt that this was a good break from all the running/and travelling I`ve done. In fact, I think, I had enough of those and would really mine settling down for a while.

Tomorrow, the hectic schedule of a debater will kick in. 2 weeks of debate with three tournaments. Wish me good luck and the best of health J

Melbourne - Part 4

New Quay

The defining monument of New Quay is the giant ferries wheel. (Eye on Melbourne?) And like all giant ferries wheel, it`s expensive, empty and not functioning properly. This one been malfunctioning for half a year.

That said, the New Quay is a awesome place to go for a weekend family outing.

Plenty of nice shops with competitive price, even for Malaysians. But the biggest attraction was the homely feeling of people shopping with the rest of their family.
On the last day in Melbourne before I left for KL (the journey of a thousand horror) I visited Yarra Valley. The place where most wines were made.

So we took a tour to the wineries. We went to a total of 3 actually, and all of them offered different wines for tasting. I tasted a little more than 10 types of wine. Yay :)


We also saw the wine yard


and the breweries
but the best part was it, the scenery around this valley is stunning.


Imagine being drunk in this area. You`ll won`t be much mistaken to call this paradise. :)

This space is my simple escape from the harsh reality. Expect lots of random rants and whining apart from the daily reporting of things going I`m going through.

Take nothing seriously, leave comments, or just a simple hi. The world is getting smaller by the day, why not know each other now. Have fun ya all.

Regards,
Alex