A tale of a motorway journey

It`s literal.... no metaphore, no symbols. Yesterday, I spent most of the day on the road... driving. Imagine driving 70 bucks of fuel in a day. Assuming that my car consumes 80 kilometer for every 10 bucks.. wait the price raised, put it 70 for every 10 bucks, i` ve traveled a rough 500 kilometer. that`s crazy.. of cuz, it won`t be that far, cuz I`m not traveling at optimized speed, but still it`s a long long way.

To sum it up, 2 fro and return trip to the ends of malacca town and ayer keroh, 5 trip from my apartment to my new house, and a trip all the way back here to Kajang. What made all of this so special, is actually not the lenght of my drive... it`s what happened along the way.

Among some interesting stuff that happened is,

1)There was no jam at all around Malacca town and all the way to Seremban.
- It`s really amazing cuz it`s a badly weekend and holiday.. I bet midvalley is jam like *#$%&$(

2) My sister make faces with a baby or the other car during a red light break.
- She even use patric to say "hi". The baby laugh.... what more funny is that the mother took his teddy bear and wawe back... lol!! It`s a malay family btw. That`s genuine semangat muhibah... not those pretentious open house gathering the minister a having every now and then.

3) It was a clear day, night.
- and it rained like there is no tomrrow in just a split second.. Yes!! split second!! and I was overtaking a lorry at that momment.. Imagine not even one drop of rain b4 overtaking and while doing it, visibility turns to almost 0. Can only see red lights. Thank heaven for the invention of wiper (and it doens`t take a minute to switch it on).

4) It jam somewhere between Kajang and Seremban.
- That never happen b4.. trust me.... But if it jams, there is alway and only one possibility... Accident happened. After stuck for quite sometime, we saw what caused it. The sudden heavy rain cause trees to uproot and fell on the highway. I hope no one was hurt... though I doubt so.. It`s a highway... but you`ll never know... miracles happens.

5) I tried to watch cartoon during the jam.
- Not from my car of cuz. Suddenly surrounding me there is 2 or 3 car that have tv installed in them. That include a 2 Naza and 1 proton Saga.. So I tailed them as close as possible and try to watch what they are watching. Couldn`t see much though. I only recognized that one car is trying to sing karaoke while the other one watching a cartoon with a green dog in it.... (anyone know what`s that cartoon?)

6) I scolded a lot of cars cuz they either drive too slow on the wrong lane, or doesn`t know that you just can`t go through cars.
- It`s pathetic I tell you.. on one hand, you have ppl who drive slowly on the fast lane, on the other hand, you have ppl flashing their headlight behind you cuz you are blocking them from overtaking. I want to go to mister, but I can`t you see... my car doesn`t just can`t go through solid material.... I don`t blame them actually... I was driving a van and I bet they can`t see that car infront blocking me.

7) I took more than 2 hours to drive home from Malacca.
That`s twice the usualy time. Partly due to trafic conjestion, partly because I`m so freaking sleepy, partly because I had to go to the toilet like 3 freaking times. So got to stop at a few rest house go to toilet and buy red bull so I can still see where my steering is.

8) I though a cop is going to fine me.
- The police slowed me down and ask me pull aside..shite.. was I speeding? ( I know I was.. but but.......it was later that I saw the police infront is actually signaling for ppl to go infront.. not to the side... stupid.. wawing to the right is not a signal to say move on). A little bit futher, a crowd gather on the road side. And in the middle, lie a body with white cloth covering it. Trust me, that all it takes to keep me awake for the rest of my journey home.. Not a thousand red bull can match that.

Well.. that was a gruesome journey.... some how, a boring journey back to malacca is not that bad after all.

Lost for words

I thought I would have a lot of things to blog... after exam and all. And I had a lot in mind what I`ll write... that till I log on blogspot and suddenly, I don`t feel like blogging anymore. I`m spending my last night here in malacca b4 I head back home for the holiday. And this holidays, is not a mere break. It`s the end of my foundation year... Next year, it`s as good as I just enter.... No friends, no study mates... everyone`s gone to cyberjaya.

It`s time to start a new.. and I don`t know whether I can learn to trust new friends... after what I`ve been through this year. It`s damm damm hard to get true friends... and till today, I doubt I can count more than my fingers of who I consider real friends. Luckly I still had one that I completely trust my life with... or not I just don`t know how I get through this year.

I really wonder what holds for me next year... I have many plans at hands... half of them are thrown away cuz I`m not in those clubs anymore... half of them are yet to realised cuz I don`t know whether it`s can carry out anymore... all that remains are just a few simple plans for the only club that Yi Chong and I started.. the chess club.

I`ve counted.. it`s exactly 360 days since I step in MMU as a freshie. I would say that the experience here it way harder to comprehend that I thought to be. I have no prob adapting to the environment.. only the people... and I sure didn`t. I don`t know whether it`s me who can`t adjust to everyone... or everyone can`t adjust to me.... At a point of time, I thought I was unfriendly, then I thought I was friendly, and I thought I was over friendly... Whatever I do, it seems that I just can`t fit in.... Maybe I`m just not meant to be.

Next sem... I hope it`s all going to change.... being a hard head that I am, it`s hard to gain respect, especially from the elders... (who likes a person who always contradicts them). Another year senior means that I have less elder to be dealt with. Though this is a method of running away from the real problem, it`s the only solution I cling to. Till of cuz, I manage to find away to please everyone, without being a hypocryte and without being double face, and of cuz.. without having to betray my own conscience.

A new academic year, a new experience... but hold it... I`m still on my holidays, and I suppose to enjoy it till the very end.... Happy holidays all MMUians. For those who I won`t be seeing anymore... all the best in your future undertaking. For those who I`ve offended, I`m really sorry and I definetly doesn`t intend to do so. For those whom I can`t seems to forget, I really hope I do and get on with my life. All the best to you and me, as we journey to life and new discoveries. Cheers

Pick this up over the net.. damm funny!!

Kuttappan is an Indian.

Kuttappan was bragging to his Boss one day,
know..... I know
everyone there is to know. Just name
anyone important, and I'm sure Iwill know
Tired of his boasting, his Boss called his
bluff, "OK, Kuttappan, how
about Tom Cruise?" Kuttappan replies "Sure,
Tom and I are old
friends, and I can prove it."

So Kuttappan and his Boss fly out to Hollywood
and knock, on Tom
Cruise's door and sure enough, Tom Cruise
shouts," Hey Kutz!! Great to see you! You and
your friend must come in and join me for lunch!
They have a blast of a time. Katie Holmes even
personally packs 2 sets of Masala Dosas, which
of course specially made by their South Indian
chef. They bid each other farewell.

Although impressed, Kuttappan's Boss is still
skeptical. After they
leave Cruise's house, he tells Kuttappan that
thinks Kuttappan's
knowing Cruise was just lucky. Kuttappan
says "No, no, you go ahead and just name
"President Bush!" his Boss quickly retorts.
Kuttappan says "Yes, OK, but I am telling you I
don't like him very much, he is very cunning,
anyway let's fly out to Washington."

And off they go. At the White House, Bush
Kuttappan on the tour and motions him and his
Boss over, saying, "Kuttans! What a surprise, I
was just on my way to a meeting. The CIA just
informed me Osama is heading for the Pakistan
Border, Hey Kuttans, are you still on speaking
terms with Osama, maybe you could confirm
information for me? Oh never mind! You and
friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee
and catch up."

Well, the Boss is much shaken by now, but still
not totally convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, he
expresses his doubts to
Kuttappan who again implores him to name
anyone else. "The Pope!" his Boss replies.
"Sure! This I like, I've been meaning to see
him, he
is not keeping too
well y'know" says Kuttappan. "And I have a lot
friends in Vatican;
it's like my second home! And me and the Pope
go back a long way, surely this will be a good

So off they fly to Rome. Kuttappan and his Boss
are assembled with the masses in Vatican
when Kuttappan says, "This will never work. I
catch the Pope's eye among all these people.
you what, I know all the guards, so let me just
upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with
The Boss shakes his head unbelievably and
says "Yeah right!!"

Still so, Kuttappan disappears into the crowd,
headed towards the
Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later
emerges with the Pope on the balcony, waves
the crowds with the Pope and takes leave.
But by the time Kuttappan returns, he finds
that his
Boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded
Walking his way to his Boss' side, Kuttappan
him, "What happened?"

His Boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine
you and the Pope
came out on the balcony and the man next to
said, and "Who's that on the balcony with

MORAL OF THE STORY- Don't underestimate an
indian !!!

What a day :)

Note that good or bad things all happens one after another. Yet today, I had good news one after another. (or rather, it`s not news, just events). I was quite worried for this morning paper, because it`s my last paper and it`s applied maths!. And I didn`t study yesterday because I had to settle some unfinish business... like informing everyone that the Year Book is finally here!! Yes.. it`s here it`s here. After my paper (which for fortunately easy,so I was quite happy about it), I rushed to the Student Press Room and hold the book with my 2 hands. One whole year of hard work being put towards it, and the book is finally materialised!!

Flipping thorugh ever page, knowing that you wrote something on it, or took some of those pictures, or design those page. Every page filled me with immense satisfaction. That`s all I need to celebrate my end of Semester 3, which if my final semster for Foundation Studies. Another thing, the year book revolutionlised every other older year book in terms of content, design and even the number of photos..... ahh! it`s damm cool... For those who didn`t buy them... it`s sure a darn waste... I just wish I can post up some pictures of the books here.... Gah!

After all the excitement, I joined with the rest of my engineering classmates to play Futsal. It`s bad enough that I`ve never touch football since primary school, I didn`t know anything about futsal. So it`s kaki bangku + I dono what`s going on kind of situation. Nevertheless.. running up and down and assuming that I played a role in the game... hmmm.. quite fun also la :P This marks first futsal experience.k :)

If you notice that there is a lot of unusually a lot and lots of structural and spelling error in this entry, forgive me, I`m rushing for a my class bbq party which suppose to start 30 minutes ago... And after that, I`m going to catch Da Vinci`s code b4 going to some unknown beaches for some unknown reasons ( god knows what my friend`s planning). Nevermind the fact that I`ll won`t get any sleeep... Must enjoy!! WEE!!!

Holiday plan.

With only 2 more paper and 3 days to go, I can`t help but thinking about holidays already. I will take my chem exam in 12 hours and applied maths in 60 and I couldn`t find the mood to study. I don`t know.... maybe I just don`t care already :) Whatever goes, goes I guess :).. Anyway... let`s talk about happy things.... like what I`m going to do in my holidays.

I`m didn`t manage to plan for my whole 3 weeks, but this is what I probably going to do for the next 7 days after exam, beginning from Wednesday 11.30 am.

Wed - Play futsal, bbq at night
Thursday - Watch movie, Ikan bakar at Umbai
Friday - Pack my house and ready to move out, steamboat at night
Sat - Head back to kajang with Adelene and probably hang out with my friends.
Sunday - Go to Sunway Lagoon with my classmates.
Monday - Go around KL.
Tuesday - Go genting, Wee
Wed - Go Mays house and marrathon some anime.. anything goes...
Thursday- Mom`s birthday... celebrate somewhere

Ops, that`s more than 7 days already. And here are some stuff that I want to fulfil before my holidays end.

- Meet up all my friends, especially those who will be leaving for overseas.
- Watch all the anime that I`ve missed.
- Train back DotA like crazy.. I sux at it so bad that I felt like I`m degrading my friend.
- Pick up a new sports... probably Squash.
- Find Aqtar and play badminton with him.. so long since I talk to him.
- Talk to my church friends. It seems that they`ve forgetten my name already...
- Read up books that I never find the time to read.. eg Da Vinci`s code, Memoirs of a Geisha..
- Think thoroughly again whether I want to continue my degree or pick another subject....

Well that`s all I guess. Seems that this holiday will definitely be a busy one.... Hope I enjoy it as much as I think I will. Until then.... Alex must bury his nose on his chemistry notes again.. :(

Smart? dumb? what is that?

I came across this topic when I went through Terri`s blog. This subject had been running all over my mind since forever, but I never really bother to blog it yet. Maybe because it`s still a grey topic to me. Or maybe because I`m just too stupid to grasp what it really meant. After some serious thinking, I choose to believe, what I believed all along.

Taken from dictionary.com . Here are a few definitions on intelligence:

-the ability to learn or understand or to deal with new or trying situations
- the ability to apply knowledge to manipulate one's environment or to think abstractly as measured by objective criteria (as tests)

-sorry Terri, for stealing this from your blog-

As a person who`s always being accuse for being intelligent, I finally begin to understand why ppl say so. It`s not the fact that I always score the highest, or ran the faster. It`s simply because I learn faster than all my friends. I play better badminton than them, my academic were a little better than them, and yada yada.....Then again, when I start comparing with people outside my sosial network, that`s where I really stand.... a lowly nobody.

My dictionary of knowledge, talent, and wisdom, doesn`t not comes only from intelligence. In fact, inteligence is only a small factor. All those smart asses, professional sports player... they are not nessacaryly inteligent. In fact, what they have is commitment. No one knows how to play a game without even holding the racquet, no one knows how to do addmaths without learning it in the first place. Inteligence only plays a role when both party have put in equal effort and commitment for that matter. It`s a tie breaker.. not 'the' factor of a person`s ability.

Back to a little reflection on myself. I`ve believed that my achievement on academic is nothing to do with inteligence. In fact, a lot of ppl are similiar to me. I can almost guarentee that almost all the top scorer you see went for kindergardent. We all start early. Maybe even way earlier b4 that. I learn my time tables in kindergarden, when everyone else learn it in primary 3. That is why you see me relaxing in class because I already got a major advantage of time. Yet, when I try to learn something that`s totaly different, like algebra... I couldn`t comprehend. I was so slow in learning that subject that my teacher gave up. And now, my ability to learn have crippled so badly that I need to do 10 times and still doesn`t fully understand what I`m doing. So, doesn`t that make me a unintelligent person... I certainly believe so.

With an additonal sin of laziness hogging me everywhere I go, that would make me even dumber. Smart = commitment + intelligence. If laziness + unittelligence = gone case. And that where I`m heading.

The best year in your Uni life?

When I was first told that Alpha (the first year equivalent in MMU) will be the best year in your uni life, I was skeptical. I don`t believe it at the slightest. I mean I worked my ass out doing this and that throughout the year without anyone appreciatting, cried countless time due to stress from certain people(s), have to go through classes with all the lecturer marking down.... I never see how anyone could call this even a good year.

Yet, until very recently, since that 'incident', I somehow manage to grasp the experience of having a class, and classmates. Since I have no more duty to fulfill, I begin to get around and know my classmates better. And in the midst of exam, I found happiness and relieved, that I`m not alone (like I am in the pass 2 semester) and I do have my classmates to go through this shit together.

Been staying over at Ians house to study/watch movie/ hang out for the past 1 week. Not only me, but May, Aaron, Hafiz, Liana also were there. We study for a while, then watch some movies... and yesterday after Prop and Stat exam, all my classmates suddenly went out for basketball.... After one whole year, this is the first time I went out with them. Usually I was too busy being in that stupid room, doing stuff that I don`t even know why I`m doing it.

It`s a pity, that out of 365 days, I only have 3 more weeks to spend with them before our term ends and almost 95% of them are going to MMU cyberjaya. Well, better late than never.... it`s nice knowing all of you.... and for once :) I felt like I`m a first year student, for real.

The american culture?

You know when the people say the media is sending the wrong message? I begin to believe that`s true. Before I begin writing this entry, just want to make sure that if there is any American reader out here, pls do not take offence. Tell me I`m wrong...is good to hear from the other side of the world.

Here goes. After watching quite a number of those US teen movie.. I conclude that


1) They are plain stupid and only think with their dicks.
2) They all play football, every where, anytime... in the hallway, in class, in dorms....
3) They always flung their paper, skip school, head for party and all the matter in the end is lots of sex.
4) If they don`t do they above, the are typical nerd and wear a thick specs.
5) And nerds don`t get any pussy.
6) Even if they do, it`s always with another nerd. (meaning another girl with thick specs and braces)


1) They seems to be the only one in class that a studying.
2) They evil ones are almost the biggest bitch in the world (in fact, in the movie, they are)
3) And they get lots of sex.
4) The fugly (fucking ugly) ones are desperate for sex.
5) The main character doesn not look for sex, but true love... which always ended with sex.

I`m sorry.. this is what I got from those movies.


p:s - I update this entry for the sake of updating. So don`t bother ;

Tomorrow will be my English paper. A subject which haunts quite a number of my classmates because it cost them their 4.0. Imagine, in an engineering course, all their maths and science subjects scored an A but for english, it`s either A- or B.

The paper tomorrow will be more on literature, comprises of 5 story; A rose for Emily, Impulse, Liberty Hall, Catbird Seat and Winter Run. Most of the story are symbolic. Have to make sure what the rose really meant and yada yada.

During the beginning of semester, I was reluctant to go through those literature. (if you study the pearl back in form 5, u know what I meant). Yet, I force myself to go read, not wanting to be another number with those who fail to score a 4 because of this subject. To my suprise, I grow to like these so call art. It`s pretty fun once you knew exactly what the message they are get across. This of course provided that the stories are not long and windy. The little sarcasm and jokes keeps you attracted and of cuz the fear from failing the sub. adds as a factor to keep on reading.

After reading each story almost 5 times, I`ll be going to exam tomorrrow :). And just a note to all first year student next year, do not rely too much on your lecturer.... they probably know less than you. Do your on revisions, get your own sources, or find a lecturer that u really really know that she put all her mind and heart into her work. Yet, after all, it comes down to your effort.

Despite the effort I talk so much about, I watch another movie today :P Called Poseidon or something. It`s about a ship that`s sinking and a group of people trying to get out from the boat. To make it simple, it`s a failed attempt to imitate Titanic. Better graphic, better effects, but lousy plot and it`s damm illogical. Don`t bother watching it, especially if it`s pirated and it`s played on a laptop. Spended 2 hours guessing what happened. Just knew explosion everywhere... people dying here and there... and the hero survive! how typical..... They should really come out with some brilliant idea. How about the hero die and everyone else survive. Wink :)

I make a lousy story writer for sure :P

Today, it begins...

My finals will start in another 9 hours. The first paper, Physics 3. My subject with the lowest carrier marks. Yes, you did not read wrongly. My lowest marks is Physics. Never in my life I though this would happen, but it happened. Suprise as I am, I made myself to do something I never though I would do. Study physics ( in addition to the fact that I studied). Spent my last 3 days at ians house eating all his food, ops, I mean studing at his house, I should be sufficiently prepared..... I hope... I just realised that the total time I study is not even enough to replace the time I spend sleeping in class. Aiks...

Anyway.... let just see how it goes tomorrow. I`ve been negleting all my other subjects though. That includes another killer subject, applied maths. Bah... I believe everything will turn out well. The exam time table is spread out nice enough to provide ample time to prepare for each and every subjects. To maintain my results, I need to score at least 50/50 for physics and applied maths, 40/50 for chemistry and statistic and 50/60 for English. Prep will be definitly not enough... what I really need is luck... wink wink :)

Now my biggest worry, is to get up tomorrow morning. Sleeping at 3-4 am and waking up 2-3 pm everyday, I wonder how am I going to wake up at 8 tomorrow. I very likely to oversleep or even worst, sleep during the exam. I mean mentally asleep. Eyes wide open but empty inside....
Right now, I`m not sleepy at all. Should I just wait till tomrorow and sleep after exam.... not a very bright idea. hmmm.. Maybe I should just start waiting at the Exam hall now. I`ll hug the door handle and make sure no one goes in with waking me up. Hee.. evil evil.. that would work.

Physics 3... here I come!!

The world is evil

The toughest battle a anyone could face, is the battle against himself. I watch fearless today, yes I know it`s out dated. I was sad to learn that this is Jet Li`s last kung fu movie. I love his actions, his self righteous and the-most-holy person in the world kind of aura. The movie was so thrilling that I rewatch part of it right after the movie ended.

I learn something through the movie. Too much success makes one arrogant. Not realizing the fact, I`ve already failed in my life before I even fail my exam. Need to learn to be humble. Never to whine about what I didn`t get, or what I should get. I should change… for good.

I always thought that I was the most miserable person on earth. Always threatening myself to jump down from my apartment every single day because I just don`t know how to face tomorrow. Then today, just after church, while I`m buying dinner with my remaining 8 ringgit in my wallet, someone approach me. Not anyone I knew. Just a little kid. Very young. Definitely less that 10 years old. He approach me and ask if I want to buy biscuits. Then he took out pack of biscuit and show me, pleading me to buy. The basket was 3 times his body width. It was obviously heavy for him.

I really felt like crying. Not only that I couldn`t help him cuz I just spend my last few ringgit buying dinner, I feel sad that parents actually exploited their children to fetch pity from customer. Even if I have the cash, I don`t know whether should I buy from the buy. If I buy out of pity, means his parents plan works and thus they will continue to push the boy to sell things on the street. I told the boy no thanks. He promptly put back the biscuit and proceed to the next table…. Repeating the same process of selling again.

There is no one to blame actually. Parents are poor. Father couldn`t support the family. The child have to work.. and the child will get no proper education…. And the cycle continues. So many people out there are like that….. struggling daily just to earn enough to buy their dinner… and here I am, in a private university, with 8 ringgit to spend for my dinner, with a computer to blog with……

I swear if I don`t do something to change the world as it is…. I`ll be willingly be thrown to hell.

Paparoti - the father of all roti

Just as you think pensonic is an imitation of panasonic.... you haven`t seen paparoti. It`s name is meant to oppose it`s originator - rotiboy. See, you are the boy, I`m the father... so listen to me or else....... It`s as literal as it sounds... It claims to be the father of all roti... lol.. Come more.. at least use the word bread... then it won`t sound so alike. :P Papabread.. lol... (a little bit spelling error will results in Papa beard!!).

For all those who has yet to come acorss this shop... it looks exactly as roti boy. Their product is ofcuz, the same as roti boy also.. which is the mexican bun. Even their plastic bag looks the same. The only difference is that it`s 10 sens more expensive and it doesn`t even taste as nice as roti boy...

This is just one of the many case of a partnership crisis. Two person originated a company/organization. Two fellow disagree or argue on something. One fellow quit and set up a new store of the same thing just across the streeet. I have countless of it.... and they are proud bout it.. using the (almost) exact name of the original company.

Hmmm.. I really wonder will I face the same problem if I decide to start a company someday.

Honesty is rare

I quote myself (from the chatbox). "everyday seems to get a little better" . I was so wrong!!!! Today prove to be argueably another "worst day ever". Starting with my quiz that I screwed up cuz I woke up late to the point where every lecturer wants to mark me down cuz they think I scored too high in the past 2 sems.... everything just went wrong. Even the water today seems a little colder... (which is bad!)

But what really happened is that my phone gave me a problem... again. Just barely a week after I spend rm 50 bucks spent repairing it, another problem occurs. The last one wasn`t too serious.... It was because my phone can`t charge. Yet, it cost me rm 50... (which I`m pretty sure I`m conned some way some how). Then today, with no reasons at all, my phone auto restarst when I charge my phone. What more, it repeats and repeats and keeps on repeating endlessly. It on and off at a frequency of 0.5hz (once in two seconds).

I dono how it happen, but what I know is that I` m dead without my phone. With no means of communication, I would have to stay home without any form of contact with the outside world... And I haven`t even come to the part that I`m suppose to go Wesak walk with Adelene today. Now without my phone, I couldn`t go anymore as I won`t know where to meet her, how to meet her and yada yada. Life without handphone is so difficult that I`m suprise how I survived 15 years without one. Of cuz it`s quite different here as I rely on phone to meet up friends and stuff and we don`t have regular classes so any annoucement is made through smses... and I don`t have a house phone if anyone wants to contact me (not to mention I don`t stay home all the time).

So, due to the absence of my phone, I missed the Wesak walk and the-satay culup-after the walk. I`m sorry Adelene :( Yet, it`s still not the worst. I brought my phone to the shop, they told me that this problem is totaly different from the last problem so they will charge again. Secondly, the told me it`s probably a hardware problem (again!! omg.. it`ll cost more than 50 bucks this time), Third, they told me that tomoorrow is a public holiday so they won`t fix the phone till tuesday. 5 days without phone!! are they crazy? And I stop believing them after they told me that it`s hardware problem again.... it`s weird cuz they said the same thing last week.... Even weirder, last week, they repaired my phone even though I asked them not too if it cost more than 30 ringgit. They say it`s alrigh, if I don`t want to, they`ll just remove back the parts they`ve replaced.

So, I walked out of that shop and went to another one. They told me that I`ve been conned the last time I fix my phone. It`s seems that the 'parts' they claimed to replace had never been replace at all. In fact, there is nothing wrong with my phone the last time, just that the connector is stained and they basically clean it up and charge me rm 50. grrrrr.. (damm i knew it that they cheated my money somehow). This is not the first time though. Back in form 5, I had to go through 3 handphone shops before I finally found an honest guys who not only fix my handphone for half the price, he lend me one of his handphone to use while my hand phone is under repair, and he really fix my phone once and for all. I felt so grateful that I promised that I`m going to purchase all my reload card from him.. And recommend my friend to fix their handphone in this shop.

But since I`m now in malacca, I had no choice but to go to whatever shop here, hoping to find an honest technician in this shop. I proceed to ask them what`s my problem this time. He told me it`s probably a software problem because I can still on and off my phone just that it gets restarted everytime I do so. He then ask me to leave the phone for the night so he can rushed it by tomorrow for me.... It will cost me 30 bucks though the reinstall the whole software in my phone.. Without any choice, I agree... hoping that it`ll solve my problem.

Then it struck me, if I reinstall the software, don`t that means all my current memories will be reformatted. He said yes, and it probably already did since my handphone can`t even on. It was so shock, so hard broken that I couldn`t utter a word.

Imagine.... there is 384 number that is not saved in my sim card as there is no more space in those tiny chips. Anyone who gave me his number after April 2005 (excatly one year ago), those ppl are gone from my phone book. Imagine, I can`t even call my friend out for dinner anymore cuz I`ve lost thier phone number. And if they don`t call me in return... I`ll just lose thier number forever. Not to mention, that the last class ended today.... means I won`t see them again to ask for thier number anymore.

Then, there is about 1000 pictures that I took will be gone into thin air. The pictures of my family only trip to the zoo with my bro, the pictures of my ex classmates, the pictures of aqtar with his formal wear on our SPM award ceromony. the pictures of me working with nick for the first time, the pictures of me and adelene in pangkor, the pictures of my cousins, the only picture of ei leen and me together, jamie, may, and all the rest.. they`re gone...

Gone.. gone.. no where to be found..no tears could bring them back... the only memories now are in my mind. How long will it last...... :(

Questions to blogspot.

This is crazy.. I`m blogging consistanly everyday!!! Mwahaha.... qualify to be the next kennysia...(without the ability to blog properly though). If i continue for another 3 days, I`ll be blogging daily for one week. A personal record actually. So much blogging that I really didn`t know time past really quickly. I only knew that it takes an average 30 minutes to blog.. I certainly didn`t realised that I`ve been doing that for almost 2 years already.. (since 2004).

Over the year(s)... I had one big question, what is the space limit for a blog account? I`m getting worried because I`ve properly bloged a couple of hundreds entry and I value every single one of them, especially the first few entries. Not to say it worth anything, but I holds the my memories. I beginning to feel that my brain capacity it`s getting smaller and smaller. Nothing comes in anymore but everything inside is slowly leaking out. I realised that I can`t calculate as fast as b4, I can`t play piano as gracefully as b4, I can`t play badminton as fast as b4, I can`t think as sharp in chess games anymore compare to my sec. school days... I`m de-evolutionizing (is there even such word? see even my english is getting worst day by day).

Worst of all, my memory is getting really bad. I forget stuff I`m holding, I can`t even repeat a sentence my lecturer said a minute ago. I can`t do a question my lecturer explain in classes just 5 hours ago. If everything`s lost, I don`t want my memories to go away too. Even if I die... those will be what I am.

Ok, enough of drama now. Back to the original question. Do blogspot actually have a space limit. Some heavy blogger like XiaXue post tonnes and tonnes of pictures almost daily and her achieve is still fine after so long. I don`t know if she made a special deal with blogspot (cuz she definitely can afford it.. being a blogger celebrity in singapore). Btw, did you know I blog even earlier than them lol!!!! bleh.. my hits are like hundreds of times lower than them... unfair unfair.

Side tracked again. So, the next question, if blogspot suddenly decide to shut down it`s server, how can we achieve all our entries without copy and paste every single one into microsoft words? And the final question. Since we can write and program the page by html, can we just program it into anything we like, (and since it`s unlimited space lol.. u get what i mean right?) hmmm... will it violates the policy... :)

I knew blogspot will never answer me personaly... just hoping some tech-savvy guy who love blog hopping come across this entry :)

Exam rants...again

First of all... notice that I haven`t been spamming my own chat box. That`s because I can seems to load it. I dono whether it`s the same for you guys. Can you guys view the chat box? can someone please tell me... I don`t know whether it`s the connection`s prob or the chat box server`s prob.

Now, back to life. Classes seems very pointless nowadays. The lecturers are trying to cancel every class they could resulting in me going to MMU and going back home right after. Even if there is classes, 3 quarter of the ppl aren`t around. I wish I could be one of them but my conscience wouldn`t let me after I nearly 'failed' my physics and applied maths.

The university in itself looks pretty empty but all the library and study/meeting rooms are pack with ppl. It`s like pop culture or something. Everyone let`s study cuz it so cool and everyone is doing it. I personally don`t have a problem with it. BUT THEY DON`T FREAKING STUDY. They just sit down, chat and occupy a whole table making other ppl not be able to study.

Then again, I don`t study... so I have no right to whine. I need some motivation to study.. so here goes... 5 reasons why Alex should study.

1) To get a scholarship - duh.. I still haven`t been offered any.
2) To make mom happy - she seems to be telling everyone that I got 4 for the past few sems.
3) To prove that I can score if I really try - after doing so bad for midterms, I really need to redeem myself.
4) To make sure my lecturer doesn`t kill me - oh yes, I`ve been threaten if I don`t score an 'A' I`ll be...... (courtesy of sleeping too much in class)
5) So that I at least I can bluff myself I`m not stupid - Sigh... but consciece still tells me that I am.

Alex. study.. exams coming... don`t blog so much la.... aiyo...

I`m free :)

I`m actually very free now... too free. I dono why I don`t feel the pressuer of studying even though I`m failing my subjects left and right..... I`m calling everyone to play badminton, magic... yada yada... The only light that came today is that my internet connection in BBU is back online :) Actually I kinda love this apartment. I can watch astro downstairs in the club house. Free newspaper and air con. I can go for gym or play pool.... then I can go and swim... Not too bad... Why in the world I want to move out? ( cuz all your friends is moving out, Alex.) Oh ya.. sigh....

Until then, I have about 20 days to stay in this apartment. Since I`m so free, I might consider taking a dip in the swimming pool downstairs which I haven`t step into since the first day I`m here. I mean I really have nothing better to do except for blogging everyday... and no one reads my blog anyway... I`m now considering whether I should keep my blog public or put it personal.... Why do I want to make it public in the first place?

My blog basically carries nothing more then my own personal opinion and sometimes.. those opinions pisses ppl off. It carries no benefit to the world or society. I never blogged much of thought provoking article nor and informative ones. So. might as well I just write everything in microsoft words and save it up there. Heck, I don`t even need an internet connection who that.

I never thought it is possible to do so until the past 2 days where I don`t have a connection and I type my entries in microsoft words, save it, transfer the file using a friends pen drive and upload through his comp. All this trouble for unknown reasons that I can`t justify. Hmmmm... weird.... why do ppl blog? hmmm

(If there is one thing that prevents me to close dowm my blog is that I lazy to achieve all my files here to words :P... aha! laziness might just be a good thing after all )

The morning after....

Waking up in the morning now seems so much harder than usual. I got up from my bed, wash my face, brush my teeth and I don’t know what to do next. It’s like of all a sudden, I’ve just lost my direction in life. I had no one to talk to, no where to go, nothing to do, basically nothing more than just another living organism.

The moment I’ve decided to walk out of the room, I lost at least 3 quarter, if not ALL of my friends here in Malacca. The remaining one quarter didn’t help much. There either thought I was still bz in the room, so they continue their own sweet life, or they thought that finals coming so I really don’t care about you. I’m left all alone. Adelene have to go back and be a good girl at home cuz her brother is coming back…. So even she can’t accompany me.

I know what you are thinking, there is always my wife (yes.. my computer). Well, my computer is being funny with all those errors and stuff… it’s more like… your life is miserable. Let’s see whether I can make it even worst. And it did…. The internet is gone. This is my fault actually. 11 months ago when I move into this apartment, I’ve registered my comp for internet… and I got it. Then after a couple of weeks, I move my comp to SPR so that it could be at service for that board. (lending my wife away… now u understand why she’s angry.) Somewhere in the middle of the year, the management of the university requests everyone to re-register their computer and I didn’t because my comp isn’t in the apartment anymore. So, now my comp is back and well… and I’m stuck here without internet, without friends, without anyone.

Adrian didn’t seem to well either. A number of us couldn’t slept properly after that night. The scenario of injustice, betrayer, ignorance, and hatred couldn’t budge out of our mind. What more, I still have to face those people and pretend that nth ever happen, knowing that they are happy and rejoicing of what had happen. And those plans and works that we have started together. I still have to finish it even though I’m not part of it anymore. I don’t know what could be worst. I can’t avoid them but I can’t be with them. I’m stuck in the middle.. with no where to run, no where to go.

Well, to be optimistic, I try to look at the bright side. Somehow, I knew that this is what I’ve ask for. I’ve been whining a lot to God that I’ve in so much trouble and pressure that I just can’t take it anymore. Now that I’m virtually stress-free (except for the pressure in exams), I can do a lot a lot of things that I haven’t tried before. In fact… there are so many that it’s almost insanity that I’ve gave it all up just for one society.

Among them are play sports with my friends. I really wanted to play sports cuz I really love playing (apart from pc games). Now I could play badminton with my badminton club members, squash with sujj, and next years, I can be active in ping pong, tennis, badminton, archery, and so many more. I might even join back CF as I really miss sessions.

If anyone has any word of consolation.. now is the time to blurt it out.

The biggest change in my life

For those who knew me, one would see how passionate I am about the Student Publication Board. I’ve joined the board since week 1. I rejected offer from a public university because of the board. I’ve move in my comp in the SPR because of the board.
I forego the chance of mixing around with my classmates because of this board. I was not active in many other clubs because of the same reason also.

I’ve dedicated my lifestyle towards this society. It brought me so much pain, hate, yet I know that I want to serve this society and this university. I’ve even planned the direction.. on the activity next year.. what are we going to do.. what will be the agenda for the first meeting… I`m prepare to do so many thing for this club. I volunteer myself for every single event, job, task… and I dedicated myself doing it. I hate writing articles cuz I suck at it, but I try again and again to write the best I could… I take 200-300 pictures in every event I cover…. Staying late way past midnight just to make sure that the event is up on Nexus as soon as possible… Staying for meetings even though I have assignments to pass up… (which will take a great toll on me this sem… I will definitely not score a 4 anymore).

And on this very day…. 5th of May. I’ve walk out of the club. Not that because I want to…. But because I have to. For once, I had a taste of what professionalism and politics are. A fight for a better future, even though you have to make a choice not to be part of that future. I wouldn`t elaborate much what happened. What I can do is to pray that the board will still have the ability to function and serve it`s purpose.
Things that I`ll definitely miss in SPR

- Sitting on those red chair while whinning about works to be done.
- Wacking Wilz and Razman with bolster and start a bolster fight.
- Holding SPB`s camera and knowing that I`ll never use that camera to take events anymore
- Staying up late and falling asleep in the room.
- Watching late night movies together.
- Going out for lunch with who ever that is in the room.
- Spamming the whiteboard.
- Will definetly miss porporing, mew chan, yoda and all the other bolster in the room.

Goodbye SPB. I wish for all the best for you.


Language... it`s the worst way of communication. Some ppl chooses to use some other words, some ppl don`t. Some ppl tolerate other words, some ppl don`t. I went for an interview just now. Being in that club for one year.... they still need an interview, the same interview i went through last year. And there is this colloum that requires u to describe urself. I wrote this

" I think this is bullshit. I`ve been serving this club for one year.
What`ve I did, my work, my conduct, that`s who I am"

My justification for this;
Everyone can say who they are, how great they might be, who they have done.... but then if you can clearly see that they have been working throught out the whole year... then u should use than judgement thus, that collum no longer serve it`s purpose.

Their reply ;
You #*&($*%&$*(%&(*&(*$%&. Ok, it wasn`t that bad. But, They were VERY VERY VERY offended. zomg... To them I`ve just insulted them because their effort of putting down that collum was hoping to get something out from there. It was then very much later that the president said that it`s protocol that`s why that have to put it there. I apoligize to them.... because I really didn`t know they took it so harshly.... sigh.. my bad.. should have just left it empty.....

Then, I offended them again.... they gave ma a scenerio... The president ask me to gather all the member for a meeting in 30 mintues and I have an exam soon. What will I do. I told them that i`ll ask the president if he have anything more important to do.. if he doesn`t, I`ll just ask him to fuck off and do the work ur self.

Again.... this time, there are really angryh.. zomg... scary... Staying around certain group of friend, where they tell u to fuck off day in, day out..... I could hardly understand how grave this matter can be... I have to go through a serias of endless apoligizing again... :'( This is cool... I went for an interview and I suddenly all the interviewers... life is just great.

Now, mommy said that using the "f" word is bad.... I couldn`t agree more.... Children, learn ur lesson.

Running away does not solve the problem.

The past weekend was undoubtly the best weekend I`ve had in months. On saturday, I got tumpang my friend from Malacca all the way to KL and I manage to go for the O2jam gathering without even taking any public transport. The gathering it self for super cool. I meet back most of my clan members. Even though they aren`t closed, but they are nice to be with. A blend of every type of person ; geek, nerd, quite, loud, good bad.. everyone is in one clan.. with one similiar hobby.

I manage to get a few stuff from the gathering. A cap, keychain, cds, gift pack, and 600 e points.!! (100 e point for 10 ringgit). Happy happy :) Love o2jam gathering, even though I suck at that game.

Then at night, I went to meet another old friend of mine. See her very very seldom recently. Used to chat which each other after tuition back in secondary school... oh well.. the good old days. Then later, I went to inferno cyber cafe and sure thing, nick, chong and low were there. Played a game of dota b4 we go :) mwahahaha.. totaly owned them :) happy

On sunday, I went to MMU cyberjaya to debate... actually more to adjuricate. I was made chair for 2 debates... (reason - there were`nt enough adjuricators). THe first debate was a rather messy one... it`s so hard to understand what they are saying and I have to give them an oral adjurication. It wasn`t so hard though considering they were so much that they can improve. The second one, was a debate where almost all the debaters there are better than me. And I have to adjuricate them.... lol.. I can recognize who win... and manage to give them some little advice but only to the losing team. The winning team were so good that I have to take advice from them.. lol (they were masters student btw).

And of cuz, at night I went to play dota again... wee!! just too fun... not to mention my mom cook me lamb chop, :P

On monday, I went to play badminton b4 hurying back to malacca. Then it`s back to reality. Piles of homeworks need to be done, academic essay still yet to be written... and I haven`t blog for the past few days :P.

I sometimes wish hols were a little longer, exams a little latter..... and my life might just be alittle happier :)

This space is my simple escape from the harsh reality. Expect lots of random rants and whining apart from the daily reporting of things going I`m going through.

Take nothing seriously, leave comments, or just a simple hi. The world is getting smaller by the day, why not know each other now. Have fun ya all.